Setting Sexy New Year’s Resolutions in Just 3 Steps

As we’re getting the new year started, you may be reflecting on your personal growth and setting goals for your health, career, and beyond. But what about your sexual health? To navigate this upcoming year with confidence, it’s helpful to start by taking an inventory of your sexual goals and experiences. So let’s kick off 2024 with some tips to help you compile your own list of sexual resolutions.

Reflect 

No two people are exactly the same when it comes to sexuality. Your sex life is unique to you, which is why reflection is the first step in setting fulfilling sexual resolutions. But where should you start? Here’s a quick list of questions to consider as you look back on your sexual experiences.

• How have my desires changed from 2023 to 2024? 
• What were my favorite sexual sensations or experiences? Why? 
• What do I want to experience more (or less) of in 2024? 
• What do my partners want from me? Do I know how they feel about our sex life?
• Is there something I’ve always wanted to try but haven’t yet? 
• What do I want to experiment with when it comes to sex? What have I been curious about? (e.g. role play, masturbation, partners, sex toys, etc.) 
• Do I have any sexual conditions I need to address in the new year? 
• How do I feel about my relationships with my sexual partners? Is there anything I should communicate to them? 
• By 2025, what do I want to be true about my sex life? 
• Are there any sexual boundaries I need to establish in 2024?

This list could go on and on, but hopefully it’ll help spark some ideas of your own. To make this exercise as effective as possible, try jotting down as many questions as you can think of from you and your partner’s perspectives. This will give you a holistic view of your sex life, and therefore help you set more well-rounded goals for the new year. From there, you can choose to think through these questions while on your way to work, on a jog, or in a conversation with your partner. It’s up to you!

Make a Plan

Now that you’ve asked yourself all the right questions, it’s time to make a plan of action. This may feel overwhelming at first, but breaking things down into smaller steps can make a big difference. Specifically, it can help to categorize your goals so that you can create an actionable plan for each one. Let’s walk through some examples of how reflections can easily turn into action plans.

Let’s say your main sexual goal for 2024 is to be more experimental with your partner. This can include things like role-play scenarios, sex toys, new sex positions, multi-partnered play, and beyond. First things first, let’s bring a clear list of ideas to your partner—it’s important to understand what they’re open to. We recommend you first think about what your partner is into, and take that into account before you initiate a conversation about your ideas. Then, you can have the conversation at the right place and time; remember, right before or after sex isn’t usually the best moment to bring new information to the table, so pick a non-sexual time and place to start this conversation.

The good news is that if you complete the first step of reflection, this planning phase will be easier. Understanding exactly what your personal goals are means you’re extra prepared for conversations like these with your partner. From there, you and your partner can negotiate and explore your individual goals and expectations for the year ahead. Once you’re both clear on your sexual resolutions, you can make a plan that fits your life. Here are some planning ideas to get you started.

• Can these resolutions be implemented spontaneously or should they be scheduled? 
• How can we incorporate these sexual goals into our day-to-day lives?
• Should we plan date nights where we can experiment with these goals? 
• Are there any challenges in the way of these goals? (e.g. conflicting schedules) 
• If there are any challenges, how can we navigate them?

If you’re experimenting with self-pleasure or are sexually active with casual partners, some helpful considerations could include:

• Where can I meet more partners who’d be interested in the same sexual goals as I am? 
• How should I prepare for a chance encounter? (e.g. Practicing condom safety) 
• What new masturbation techniques can I try?

Ultimately, the purpose of the planning phase is to set goals in achievable ways. That’s why these inspiration questions are meant to drill down to the details. So when you’re planning on your own, make sure you understand the how and why behind each of your sexual resolutions.

Get To It

Now comes the fun part. With the proper reflection done and a plan in place, it’s time to set that plan in motion. Don’t worry, we’re not talking about following a minute-to-minute planner—more like a general plan. While this will look different depending on each individual and their goals, there are some universal tips to keep in mind once you start acting on your resolutions. 

Keep Educating Yourself

When it comes to sex, you never stop learning and discovering new things. That’s why staying open to new information about safer sex practices, anatomy, and pleasure is a key part of a fulfilling sex life. After all, being well-informed empowers you to make educated choices when it comes to your sexual health. So remember to keep an open mind as you fulfill your sexual resolutions. 

Prioritize Communication

Like we always say, you can’t have a truly next-level sex life without communication. Over the next year, you and your partner(s) will change and evolve as people. That’s why maintaining an open line of communication is so important. This way, you can navigate the next year’s worth of sexual experiences with confidence. 

Reset & Repeat

A year is a long time, and it’s common for New Year’s resolutions to lose steam as the hustle and bustle of day-to-day life kicks in—just like most peoples’ resolution to lose 15 pounds. That’s why it can be easy to let monotony dull the initial enthusiasm you felt. But that’s completely normal! The best way to navigate this challenge is to set checkpoints with yourself and your partner. This gives you both a chance to re-invest in your goals and remember why you set them in the first place. With this crucial step in mind, you’re more likely to follow through on your 2024 sexual goals.

While everyone’s sexual resolutions will look different, the process of setting these goals successfully should include reflection, planning, and follow-through. Whether it's through open communication, self-education, or setting checkpoints, these goals should boost your overall sexual well-being. So as we start this new year, let's celebrate these goals and toast to a fulfilling 2024!